Advice for my daughter on her birthday

Some months before my daughter was born, I started writing down (well, writing in emails to myself) things I've learned over the years that might save her some trouble to know. I've been holding onto this for a while now, so I'm putting this out there now so she can read it when she's able.

The rest of this post is for her.

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In honour of your first birthday, here's some advice from me to you. It won't make sense to you now, but it will at some point. I could just wait and tell you these in person over the years, but I felt it would help their creditability to you by posting them anonymously on the internet.
All of these have stood the test of time and helped me over the years. All I can hope is that some of this might make your life a little better.

Never get the cheapest of anything unless you know exactly what you're getting into. There's a reason it's cheap, and if they could legally make it cheaper, they would.
That said, if it's cheap and small enough, experiment. Sometimes the cheapest option is the one which leaves out all the crap you don't want.

Start a skin care regime by 20 at the latest. You'll appreciate it when you're 40 and people are constantly shocked to find out how old you are.

Never tell someone when you find something is broken. A fair chunk of the time they'll just not notice and make it work anyways. Thanks for letting me stay at your place. As thanks, I baked you some cookies. – oh, I meant to tell you, that oven has never worked since I moved here.

Rocket science is easy – it's rocket engineering that's hard. Anyone with a pencil and a basic knowledge of maths can figure out the escape velocity to get into the desired orbit. The hard thing is figuring out what chemical reaction will get the rocket up to speed. But without exploding the rocket. Or destroying the ground under it. Or what to make it strong enough to bear the strain, but not too heavy to lift. And make sure it goes in the right direction (up). And with a reasonable acceleration to not destroy the payload. And that doesn't include what to do once it's in orbit. Engineering is like art. You never finish a project – you just declare it good enough it and hope for the best.

Dare to be different is easy. Anyone can be contrary. The hard thing is to dare to be the same. It's okay to like what everyone else likes if you really do like it.

Follow you dreams, but remember, someday you'll actually finish them. And then what? Keep in mind what you want to do next. When playing pool the trick is not to just get the ball in the pocket, but to set yourself up to make the next shot as well.

Don't be too afraid of trying something new. The world can take you to wonderful places if you let it.

Just because someone doesn't like you doesn't mean you shouldn't be nice to them. There's no point in being mean to them, and if they're actually a decent person, they'll eventually come round.
Likewise, just because you don't like someone, doesn't mean you should be mean to them. Actually, not being mean to those you don't like makes them that much more tolerable.

You can do anything if you have enough time or enough money. With enough effort a single dedicated person can produce a world-class creation. Don't be put off trying something because you don't have the materials or aren't qualified. And don't be afraid to ask for help from people you trust.

Not everything you feel makes sense. You're just a bag of meat and hormones that thinks it's a person – just like everyone else. Learn to recognise when there's a good reason for you to feel sad, tired, angry or whatever. And also recognise when it's just because your body is just out of whack.

When you're wrong, admit it. Then try to fix it. Then move on. Rarely are the consequences of screwing up worse than the gaping hole of trust denial leaves.

Patience is not a virtue. You can end up just watching life pass you by. Do it now. And if you fail, there's still time to try again later.

Keep a duplicate of all your essential medicines, toiletries and makeup in a small bag. Spontaneous adventures are much more fun when you feel clean and looking your best.

That which does not kill you only sometimes makes you stronger. But it still really hurts and always takes time to recover.

Time spent clubbing till the wee hours is not wasted. Some of my closest friends to this day were met clubbing. And the dancing is great exercise – I'd never been so fit in my life than when I was going out 5 nights a week. Plus, learning to get by with lots of exertion and minimal sleep is invaluable if you ever have a baby.

I'd say Trust your instincts, but that really does depend on having some quality instincts in the first place. That will come in time. Until then, don't overthink things. Your first guess is usually correct, or close enough.
With enough second guessing you can convince yourself anything is true. The scary thing is, everything you think might be true probably is – to some degree. And the thing you thought of first most likely came to mind because it's the biggest factor.

Most people are wrong. The best admit they don't know. The worst just lie and make something up.

And finally, take advice with a grain of salt. Take this advice with a grain of salt. Don't just learn what people tell you, understand it. Use it, discard it or replace it with something better. And when you have something better, pass it on so someone else can use it or perfect it.

You've been amazing so far and I'm sure you'll get by just fine. It's been a delight just seeing the person you're becoming. And I'm kind of jealous for all the good things you've got ahead of you. Happy birthday sweetie!